I don’t think I have been more shocked by an internet phenomen as I have with the suddent fame of– I can’t believe I am typing this– Henry Earl. You’ve probably been introduced to Henry from another blog, the Jimmy Kimmel show, or his highly anticipated appearances on Fark. If not, you must first visit the authoritative guide on Henry Earl.

I’m definitely stunned that Henry is now name-dropped all around the world, but also strangely pleased that this internet phenom is actually worthy of his cult status. See, it’s not just the fact that he has been arrested over 800 times (as I write this, he is currently detained) for alcohol intoxication, that has captured the public’s imagination. Nor is it only the brilliant parade of mug shots. I think people see him as a pimptastic version of The Dude. And don’t worry we’re not gonna find out that he is a twisted marketing concept from some corporation looking for irony cred (anyone remember Lee Jean’s Super Greg?). Henry is exactly like you would imagine.

I probably first learned about Henry in high school–back when going downtown was the cool thing to do. And like anyone who has spent several years living in and around downtown Lexington, I have had many interactions with him (BTW, it is true that he is referred to almost exclusively as James Brown, but I prefer his real name). There were some evenings, when I delivered pizza for good ‘ol Mad Mushroom (man, they had some dope cheese stix) when I would see him probably 5-10 times in one night. He’d be at a table in Tolly Ho. Maybe he bumrushed a campus party. Or more often than not he would just be slowly strutting down Euclid Avenue, waiting for some kids to drive by and yell, “Yo, James Brown!” so he could flash a smile, bust his notorious shuffle, and then turn real quick and point right at ‘em.

I’m not sure the Henry fan sites, etc. are doing enough to expose his other alter-ego, Chuck Norris. Yes, Chuck F%$*#$g Norris. I saw this side of him a lot when I worked for another campus eatery, Jozo’s Gumbo (owned and operated by a true crook). He would roll up on us, and demand that we change the channel of the TV that was bolted to the upper corner of the wall. He wasn’t interested in food handouts, he just wanted to see his man Chuck do some karate choppin’. I honestly don’t know if Henry is schizophrenic in addition to being an–major understatement here– alcoholic. But the Chuck Norris thing was weirder to me than James Brown. Sometimes late at night, when I was coming home from a party or something, I would see Henry walking along and then stop, maybe look at his reflection in a parked car’s window, and then raise his fists kung fu style–at no one. This could be very startling when you were alone. He’s described as “harmless,” and besides his alleged (reliable sources tell me this is a fact) tuberculosis infection, this is probably true. But those moments when it was just you and Henry on the corner of Woodland and High, under a buzzing streetlight, the novelty wore off and he could be threatening.

Another Henry memory is one Chrstmas holiday, maybe around ‘96 or ‘97, when a rumor was going around that Henry had died. I remember completely believing it because I hadn’t seen him around in months. It never really occurred to me that the reason he seemed to disappear for stretches was because he was in jail! In Lexington, during the holidays, everyone hangs out (or at least they used to) at a bar called Lynagh’s. People that have moved away know that is where they can find their old friends. Anyway, I remember the whole place excitedly talking about James Brown being dead. Obviously, he’s still with us. Who knows for how much longer…

What do do with people like Henry? He’s been arrested over 800 times–perhaps the most arrested individual in American history. Should taxpayers continue to pay for his bed at the LFCUG jail? If not, then what is the solution? A cop reported that he walks up to officers with his hands extended, basically asking to be hauled away. “He doesn’t want help… I think it is wonderful that he is getting his 15 minutes of fame,” the officer said. The bleeding heart in me hopes that his fame will result in someone or some organization providing some serious assistance so that he can find a little peace and maybe his weathered body can start to mend.